Friday, May 14, 2010

my meeting with the literary agent

I just finished the first in a series of anti-prayers. Woohoo!!!!! I also just started researching how to get an agent. So let's say I snag an agent. The conversation might go like this:
Conversation between me and the agent
bec: Hi, I see you're interested in me.
agent: Yes. You have some great stuff here. I think we'd be a good match.
bec: Sweet.
agent: You will, however, need to do some editing.
bec: Yeah.
agent: First of all, it's too anti-god. You're going to have to fix that.
bec: Um, well....
agent: And people are going to think you're an antisemite.
bec: I'm not sure I get that.
agent: You should really join a temple. Get involved in Chabad. Buy yourself an Israeli flag.
bec: What? This all clearly against my work! Are you kidding me?
agent: Do you own a wig? Perhaps if you started wearing skirts more often....
bec: What kind of agent are you?
agent: I work with Feldheim....
bec: I see. Well, nevermind then. It's been nice speaking with you.....

4 comments:

  1. Haha! Put a smile on my face. Love it! Good luck finding a nice aidel agent. From a good family.

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  2. Lol!!!! Thanks!!! As long as the agent believes in liberal publishing, I should be okay. But once we start getting too strict, well, that's the end of that!

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  3. LOL Funny Bec. Just remember: the agent works FOR you. You're the employers. She gets up on your face? No Soup for her!

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  4. when i one day land an agent, i'm going to give her those wonderful seinfeldian words of warning!!!

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be kind.